Library door increases pass rate

A RECENT survey by the University of Glasgow has revealed that the newly installed revolving door on Level 2 of the Library is increasing the pass rate amongst students. 

Professor Hopeful, who led the study, explained that the time spent queuing to get into the building and stuck in the door itself was seen as a time for meaningful reflection.

She said: “Life at university can be very busy. From deadlines to social calendars and extra curricular activities, it is hard for many students to find time to stop and think.

“In my day, we would find time for reflection in the church on a Sunday morning. However, with the epidemic of Sunday morning hangovers taking place across the UK, it’s impossible to guarantee that personal time.

“That’s where the library door comes in.” She continued, “Students can spend up to half an hour attempting to get into the library and, in this time, find a moment for personal reflection.

“Last year, when the system worked, it was very difficult to have this and as a result we’ve seen mental health figures and pass rates improve.”

The study has been welcomed by the University of Glasgow, who are relieved they didn’t waste tens of thousands of pounds on something clearly unfit for purpose.

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